Fiestas Patrias

Tonight I write in blue, one of the colors of Chile´s flag, in honor of Fiestas Patrias. This past weekend we celebrated Chile´s Independence Day. Chile and the US are similar in that our independence days aren´t exactly when we had independence from our mother nations but rather when we declared our independence. And for Chile, that was September 18, 1810.

Photo Credit

I had been warned about Fiestas Patrias. I had been told to expect five days of non-stop asados (BBQs), meat and empanada eating, wine and chicha (kind of like homemade sweet wine) drinking, cueca dancing and staying up until 5am every night. Whoo! Thankfully I only had one day of this- so I got to experience everything but still get my precious sleep the other nights. 


I had my big day of celebrating on dieciocho itself, September 18th. Just so you know, I have been waiting two years for this. The past two dieciochos (18ths) I have heard about Andrés and his family and friends getting together and going out. I have wanted to be here for that so bad- and now I was! The 18th was Domingo, or Sunday, often referred to as "fomingo" or the equivalent of boring Sunday, so I thought that maybe Fiestas Patrias would be a little more low key this year. Maybe they were, but I didn´t notice. We started our dieciocho off with Mass at the parish where we also celebrated the priest´s ordination anniversary so the church was very full. After Mass there was cueca dancing in the courtyard and empanadas and wine! Can life get any better than that? Jesus, dancing and empanadas.

Empanadas- que rica!

After Mass we headed over to Andrés´grandma´s house in Villa Alemana which is about 45 minutes away. Pretty much Andrés´mom´s whole side of the family was there. They had already eaten their asado (BBQ) but thankfully saved us some and heated it up right when we got there. So we went around saying hi to everybody and getting reacquainted and then we sat down to eat. A very common activity to do for Fiestas Patrias is to fly kites so after eating we went to the field next to the abuela´s house to see the kites. Let me just tell you, they can go really high! Andrés´ little cousin got hers to go so high it was just a little speck in the sky, and then the line got cut so it flew away.


We left his grandma´s for a couple of hours to go visit his friend Carlos who also lives in Villa Alemana. Carlos´ family is very inviting and it was nice to be around such friendly people. We basically just sat around and drank chicha and ate empanadas while they talked. I´ve now become more comfortable with my spanish but it is still very hard to follow conversations when they´re talking so fast (at their normal rate)! After that we headed back to the abuela´s house and played a game that is very similar to bingo. I think my mom would be proud of me, I won the first game! Then we left to go home.


We got back to la casa at about 10pm, stopping for a Nescafé coffee for me and a Red Bull for him. We rested and watched tv for two hours and then headed out (at midnight!) to the ramadas.  The word ramada means branch in english and the ramadas are called such because they are usually places constructed totally out of branches where people go to dance and drink and celebrate. The ramada we went to in Concón was huge so it was a regular building and on the inside they had it decorated with branches. They had two different groups that switched playing about every half hour. First a half hour of cueca, then cumbia, then cueca, etc. I was really excited for the cueca because this would be my first time getting to dance it with Andrés outside of lessons and I had been waiting to do this with him for a long time. However, it didn´t go quite as expected. It was so packed that people kept bumping into me and the concrete floor didn´t make moving my feet very easy so that it was hard to concentrate on the music and the steps to the cueca. I ended up getting really frustrated, first with not being able to dance the cueca correctly and then my mind started blowing things out of proportion (I chalk it up to it being really late and I was tired). I was thinking that if I can´t do this, then I´m never going to be able to fit in or fully learn the language, etc, etc. I almost started crying on the dance floor. It was bad. This was my first breakdown here and I´ve heard from other expats that more will come- it can be hard adjusting to a new way of living and feeling out of place a lot of the time. Andrés saw that something was wrong and we stopped dancing but then I felt bad for having ruined things, but I couldn´t explain it to him over the music and my emotions. Thankfully, when cumbia came back on they played some fun songs and things turned around.


We ended dieciocho on a good note by stopping by the beach at 4:30am to watch the ocean and listen to the waves hit the shore. Thank God for an overall good first Fiestas Patrias.

La Cueca

It seems like my life has been taken over by... la cueca. The cueca is Chile´s national folkloric dance where the couple mimics the courting ritual between and rooster and a hen. And since the fiestas patrias (independence day celebrations) are quickly approaching, it seems like everybody is dusting off their cueca-dancing boots. Andrés´nephew S is in second grade and he´s learning how to dance the cueca in school. I´ve seen a couple of high schoolers who are preparing for a cueca test at their colegio. Andrés started taking cueca lessons in July at the Club de Cuecas y Huasos (Club of Cuecas and Cowboys) in Valparaíso. He just graduated/passed the first level last Saturday and they had a dance and dinner where all the students got to showcase their cueca skills. It was a lot of fun and now I´ve started taking the beginner level classes while Andrés has moved on to intermediate ones!


The cueca is actually one of the first dances I ever had with Andrés. We were learning it in my escuela and Andrés was my partner. I sucked at it. But now I´m somewhat okay because I have that same partner to practice with outside of class! It´s actually more fun than I thought it would be (I didn´t know I would like folkloric dancing so much), the music is growing on me and I feel so good actually knowing the steps. I can´t wait for dieciocho (September 18th, Independence Day) when hopefully I´ll get some opportunities to use my newfound skills.


Here´s a video of Andrés dancing the cueca on his graduation night:

Here´s some photos from the night:

Andrés´ friend Carlos

It went cueca, chicha, cueca. You would dance one cueca, take a drink in a bull´s horn, then dance another cueca.

The outfit of the huaso

Andrés´ friend Flaco/Ranier

The cueca can begin by clapping the rhythm until the singing starts

They all passed!

Our Love Story, Part IV

You can read Part I, Part II and Part III by clicking on them.


Okay, we left off with me telling Andrés how I felt about him and then I thought we left things at the mutual agreement of getting to know each other better. Now remember, we had seen each other pretty much everyday for the last week. So imagine my disappointment when I didn't hear from him the next couple of days. I know, I know, you're probably thinking "Two days? That's nothing." But when I only had a total of six weeks in Chile and the first four had flown by and now I'm sitting with two weeks left to get to know this guy and build a relationship- two days was a long time for me! I immediately started doubting what we had talked about and thinking he hadn't understood me and that I had probably misunderstood his intentions. Also, I wasn't going to call him because I wanted to give him the chance to pursue me. Also during these two days pretty much the entire Escuela- both students and professors- knew something was going on between the two of us. I don't know how that happened. I think I had confided in two people and I don't think they would have told anyone. It was a little embarrassing having everyone knowing my business but at the same time I had grown pretty close to them so it was okay. One thing I did NOT like though was having one of my professors going around singing to me "estas enamorada, estas enamorada!" (You're in love, you're in love!) Because I wasn't in love (yet)! I didn't know Andrés well enough to be in love.


This brings us up to Friday. The parish in Concon had a futbol tournament for their Confirmation kids and asked us to participate. Andrés was organizing the whole thing so I knew I would see him there. He says this is the reason why he hadn't called me to do something yet- because he was busy organizing the whole event and he knew he would see me there. Once again though I was so nervous! I couldn't even eat beforehand- my stomach physically would not allow me. When we first got there I think I said "hola" and that was it because what do I say to the guy I had bared my heart to and hadn't contacted me since? It turns out that our gringa team won the championship! And after that Andrés must have been so impressed with my super-slick soccer moves that he stepped up his game (haha, not). However, a huge group of us were going out that night to celebrate Sarah's, one of the gringas, birthday. So before I left the tournament (the boys were still playing, all of us girls were finished) I went to say goodbye to Andrés and he asked if I was going out with the group. I said yes and he said see you there. My heart soared!


That night we all met up on the micro (bus) and it was packed so I wasn't anywhere near Andrés but we saw each other from afar and smiled at one another. Once we got to the club I didn't know what to do. Do I make sure I sit by him or what? Also I doubt they really were but I felt like everyone's eyes were on us. Thankfully Andrés took the lead and made sure I sat by him. Then he offered to get me a drink (I asked him if he wanted money for it, hehe, and he gave me a weird look and then said no). He came back with the drink and let me take a sip of it and then took it away and took my hand and led me onto the dance floor. Then we danced together all night! While we had all arrived together, people were leaving in small groups. Andrés and I left with two others and took the micro back to Concon. As we were leaving he took my hand and put his arm around me on the micro. At that point all my doubts were wiped away and I knew he liked me too! My heart was happy.


Plus... when he dropped me off at my house that night he kissed me! Our first kiss and my first kiss EVER! That's right folks, I was 23 and never been kissed. But hey, the right guy and the right opportunity had never presented itself before so I was okay with it. But now the time had come. It turns out though that I was a pretty bad kisser. I'm pretty sure my lips turned into stone and I was a bit mortified. Also I'm pretty sure that after he kissed me I turned away to go inside the gate while saying something stupid like "thank you" or "buenas noches." Oh my goodness. But then he said "Tammy," grabbed my hand and swung me back to him and kissed me one more time. Still bad but the way he took me back to him could have been right out of a movie.


The following Saturday and Sunday we had what we called "Completomania." It was kind of a nightmare being surrounded by those giant hot dogs covered in mayonnaise for two straight days. The deal is that in a week we were going on a mission trip so we had to fundraise for it. How did we fundraise? That's right, by selling completos! Honestly, I had liked the things, but after Completomania (which was two years ago) I have only been able to eat one of them since. The upside of Completomania is that I got to sell them with Andrés- we had lots of time to talk and get to know each other as we went around Concon asking la gente if they wanted a completo. And I mean we really talked. Andrés asked me some of the hardest questions I've ever been asked (no small talk for us), such as what is my viewpoint on war and torture. Also at night he would "kidnap" and take me driving (I said driving, not parking. Although I'll admit at first I also thought he might have ulterior motives) to see more sights and to talk. It was lovely.


Monday of the next week we got the day off from school to relax after the madness that was Completomania. So Andrés, John, Kayla and I first went to see a beautiful cemetery in Zapallar, close to Ventanas, that is right on the ocean. Then Andrés gave us a guided tour of his favorite city Valparaiso. Tuesday I didn't see Andrés and on Wednesday we had our first official date of just the two of us. It wasn't totally date-like because we ended up running a ton of errands getting ready for the mission but it was still really good. You'll also be happy to know (because I sure was!) that this was the first time we shared a good kiss- meaning my lips did not morph into cement. Thursday night we went out to celebrate another gringo's, Jake's, birthday.  We had fun having a couple of drinks and dancing. Then Friday it was off to the mission.


We were on mission in Lagunillas from Friday through Tuesday. On the way there was the first time people saw us publicly acting like a couple (meaning they saw us holding hands) and I guess it caused a little stir. I was told recently that Stephanie was freaking out- I'm assuming it was a good freaking out, hehe. During the days and evenings we tried to immerse ourselves as best we could in the group activities and the mission work and then at night when most had gone to bed Andrés and I stayed up on the couch talking. It was nice to have some privacy yet to know there was accountability too. On Sunday morning (because I was leaving in two days!) I told Andrés we needed to talk soon about what we were. He thought I meant that I needed to put a label on us but I just needed to know where we stood for when I left. That night on the couch we started out talking about our relationship and then we got onto other subjects. I kept praying, "Lord, I really want him to ask me to be his girlfriend but I don't want to outright ask him to do it. Please let him read my mind!" And guess what? The Lord worked that little miracle for me! On that Sunday night (technically Monday though because it was about 3am) Andrés said, "I don't know how they do this in the U.S.... but will you be my girlfriend?" That was good enough for me and we have been together ever since!


On Tuesday we left straight from Lagunillas to the airport. Thankfully Andrés was able to come with and we got to spend a last couple of hours of quality time. That first airport goodbye was the easiest one we've ever had. I think it's because we had just started dating and neither of us knew where it was going to lead. It was sad at the actual goodbye but I didn't cry (every time since I've bawled my eyes out) and afterwards I just felt kind of numb. I wasn't much into laughing or hanging out with the other gringos and I slept the entire 9 hour flight back to the U.S. 


That was August of 2009. Since then I've been back to Chile twice- once for eleven days and once for three weeks- and Andrés has been here once for two months. Other than that we keep our relationship strong through lots of communication using Skype, gchat and MSN Live. God bless technology. Thanks for tuning in to read our story. Coming soon... Part V: Engagement! ;)

Gringa girls rule! We won the championship!

What we sold for Completomania

Meeting Andres' parents for the first time- I wasn't expecting that!

Beautiful scenery at the cemetery in Zapallar

At the absinthe bar for Jake's birthday. No absinthe for me though! I had to concentrate that night... on Andres!

Out dancing later on

On the couch in Lagunillas- look how cold it was!

Our last group photo together

Our first ever (and unfortunately not the last) airport goodbye

Our Love Story, Part III

In Part I you learned how we met, in Part II how we became friends, and now in Part III you'll get to hear how I bared my soul to Andres.


After a great night with friends, Andrés and completos, I saw him again two days later for our futbol taller (soccer workshop). About four chilenos came to play with us and make the teams more even and then about 10 more came two watch and make me feel nervous. When I saw Andrés was there talking with his friends I knew I wanted to go start a conversation with him but a) I didn't know what to say to him in Spanish and b) even English I didn't know what to say to him! So I ended up saying "Hola, como estas?" and that was it. We played on different teams and I halfway collided with him once, but that wasn't on purpose but rather due to my terrible futbol skills.


Now we get to more of the good part. On Friday school went super late (to about 8pm when it was supposed to end by 5pm) and the plans I had then had to be cancelled. That ended up with me walking home with John and John mentioned that he was going out with Andrés and some of his friends and he asked me if I wanted to join them. Of course I did! So I continued on home, had dinner with my host mom and got ready to go out. Andrés and the others came to pick me up in the truck at about 11pm and as I hopped in it was pretty full and there was a couple of people I didn't know. John quickly introduced me to Daniela, Andrés' sister, who I had seen before but not been introduced. And then he introduced me to Carol, whom he said was Andrés' girlfriend! It was a little heart-crushing. And even though it hurt a little bit, I thought to myself "this is good, now I can just concentrate on the my Spanish and mission work." Now, when John said this though, he had a smile so I thought maybe he was joking. So during the night I would glance at them sometimes to see if they were actually boyfriend and girlfriend. Conclusion: Undecided. They sat pretty close next to each other, but we all did, and I never saw them hold hands or anything. That Friday night we first joined about 5 other gringos at bar for beer and conversation and later we split off from them and went dancing for an hour or two.


Next comes Saturday. On Saturday I spent the day with my friend Jared's host family (they were so welcoming and fun!) and I enjoyed myself, but to be honest I was thinking about later that night when we had all made plans to go out again. It was finally night time and about 12 of us headed to Valparaiso (a city about 45 minutes away) to go dancing. Except we accidentally left two girls behind! Uh-oh. By the time they caught up with us they weren't in the mood to go dancing anymore so they went back and the remaining ten of us couldn't come to a consensus on what club to go to. So we ended up splitting into two groups and when I was asked which group I wanted to go with I (of course) said I wanted to stay with Andrés' group which consisted of: John, Andrés, his sister Daniela, our friend Daniella, and Carol, his supposed girlfriend. Except by this time I was pretty sure they were not dating. We ended up going to my favorite club called La Locomotora and I had such a good time. The night before we had danced mostly in a group but this night, while we stayed close to each other, we were kind of paired off. So guess who danced with me all night? That's right- Andrés! It was after this night that my heart was pretty much his.


Sunday came I didn't see Andrés this day. But something had happened to me. I constantly had butterflies in my stomach, I couldn't sleep very well and I didn't have much of an appetite. I've never had my body act in such a way before! Oh, being in love. These physical manifestations just deepened throughout the week. On Monday Andrés came to La Escuela after classes and ended up helping me for four hours on a project. Four hours! Just out of the kindness of his heart. On Tuesday I was invited to go to the movies (Transformers II!) with Andrés, his brother Michael, John, Daniela and Daniella. So up to this point I had seen him almost everyday for the past week, and I knew that I liked him a lot but I did not know how he felt about me. On the one hand, he gave me no signs. On the other, he was spending a lot of time with me! I mean, he had danced with me for a whole night and then had helped me one-on-one with my project.


And this brings us to Wednesday, which was a very important day for us. Starting Sunday I had been praying hardcore. In my mind and heart I was talking to God asking what I should do about this situation with Andrés. You see, I wasn't sure how he felt about me, I wanted him to make a move and I am of the persuasion that the man should do the pursuing so if he didn't make a move what should I do? I realized that it was July 22nd and we had only two weeks left. So I asked myself: If I left without saying or doing anything would I regret it? If I said something and it didn't turn out in a positive light would I be embarrassed enough to regret it the last two weeks in Chile? The answers respectively were yes and no- and so I decided to tell Andrés how I felt about him. He was worth the risk. 


Wednesday was to be the day I talked to him, but it wasn't so easy getting him alone. On Tuesday I had asked him if he would mind taking me on a tour around Concon since I hadn't had a ton of opportunity to explore the city I was living in. He said yes... but then invited others with! We were to go after school Wednesday in between classes and a folkloric dancing taller. Unfortunately I had to cancel because we had to do something for La Escuela instead. I was bummed because I had worked myself up into telling him and then I wasn't even going to see him. But it turns out he had been asked to come to the taller because we were short on men for dancing partners. The one dance we had together that night was the Cueca, Chile's national dance. I sucked at it! It was interesting making a fool of myself in front of him with his national dance yet I had fun with it. After the taller, even though it was already 10:30pm, Andrés asked me if I still wanted to go on my tour- he would take me driving. I said "yes!" and thought this was my opportunity but then again he invited John to go. John said no because I had asked his advice earlier in the day about this whole situation. While I got my stuff together I guess Andrés kept asking John to go and finally John told him that I wanted some alone time to talk to him. So John was out of the picture but then another friend, Laura, stepped in. She heard us talking and said she wanted to go too! Again, my alone time with Andrés was shot down.


Andrés took us on our tour and it was interesting but I wasn't very into it by that point. I had let Laura sit in the front seat because I had pretty much given up. While I sat in the backseat I think I only said a couple of words the whole time and I was praying saying, "Lord, if you want this to happen, it's up to You. If he drops Laura off first, I'll tell him. But if he drops me off first I'm not going to tell him ever." Well, God worked his little miracle and Andrés dropped Laura off first. As soon as I had climbed into the front seat and shut the door he turned to me and said "So John says you have something to tell me." I was shocked! And I knew that this was it. I told him first that I really grateful for all the times he had helped me (Colmo, school project, dancing) and that I was thankful to God for having met him and his friendship- then I told him that I liked him first in Spanish and then in English so that he would know that I knew what I was saying.


Now it was his turn to be surprised! I mean, who wouldn't be surprised when someone says something like this to them, but it was a double shock because when John had told him I wanted to talk with him he had assumed I was angry with him- but it was exactly the opposite! We ended up talking for about an hour and he started off by saying how great (and full of surprises) I was but he never said how he felt about me. I was wondering, is this the gentle let down or is he saying this because he feels the same? Well by the end we had worked out that we wanted to keep getting to know each other and we'd take it from there. I was content with that and happy that he hadn't laughed in my face. I went home that night in a good mood and yet I still couldn't sleep! My goodness.


Coming up in the fourth and possibly final post find out how we went from "I like you" to dating!

Warm-up for futbol

Friday night having fun with John and Daniella

Good memories

The girls learning their part of a folkloric dance

La Cueca- thankfully I'm hidden and you can't see how bad I was. Instead you can see how great Kayla and John were!

Our Love Story, Part I

When someone finds out for the first time that I'm dating someone in Chile they ask two immediate questions:

1. Is he Chilean? (Sometimes quickly followed by, is that the right way to call someone from Chile?)
2. How did you two meet?!

Well lucky you! The questions are getting answered tonight. Yes, he is a true born and bred Chilean (and yes that is the correct way in English to say it, in Spanish he's chileno).  And in the following paragraphs and posts I'm going to relate to you how we met and started dating.

It all started in that fate-filled June of 2009. My parish had sent me to Chile to learn Spanish in a 6 week immersion program at a school we will call La Escuela (literally, the school). La Escuela was located in an oceanside town of about 30,000 called Concon which just so happens to be the same town that Andrés lived/lives in! It also just so happens that Andrés and his family had signed up to be hosts for one of us gringos. Do you know who got placed with them?... Not me! (Were you surprised?) A great guy named John was place with Andrés' family. I had briefly met John before in college but I don't know if I could say we were even acquaintances at that point. The day we arrived in Chile we were driven straight from the airport to La Escuela where we were split up and taken to our host homes. When we reached La Escuela I was shaking like a leaf because I was having to split off from the 13 gringos I had traveled with to go to my host home where my host mom didn't speak English and I didn't know any Spanish really except "Donde esta el baño?" During this leaf shaking I remember seeing Andrés standing next to John and I thought he was one of our teachers. I didn't say anything to him or really to any of the chilenos- I was SO nervous!

Flash-forward about a week to our first meeting where we actually spoke to one another. The date was July 1, 2009 (Is it sick that I know all the dates? The truth is that I promptly recorded all the dates I could remember of our "firsts" right after we officially started dating so that I could remember them forever!). Every Wednesday night La Escuela had a cultural taller (pronounce tah-yair and it means workshop) and usually they went pretty late into the night. Our first taller was contemporary dance- we learned salsa, merengue, other things I don't remember and my favorite: reggaeton! I think we got done sometime between 10 and 11pm and since I lived farthest from La Escuela (a forty-five minute walk if I was alone, over an hour if I was with others) Andrés kindly offered me a ride home when he came to pick up John in his family's truck. During that 10 minute car ride I think I learned his name, how old he was and that he was in college. He was not extremely talkative but I was very grateful for the ride home and at this point in time I didn't really have an opinion of him. 

The next time I saw Andrés was two days later. It was Friday night and all of us (16 gringos, some host family members and some Escuela teachers) were going out to El Huevo to celebrate our teacher Daniel's birthday. El Huevo (Mr. Egg) is a giant nightclub that has five floors and each floor has a different type of music to dance to. We got to the club at about 11:30pm and stayed until 4:30am! That was my introduction to Chilean nightlife and although I was extremely tired at some points, I mostly had a blast. One minor downer of the night however was my interaction with Andrés. Disclaimer: I'm pretty sure Andrés does not remember this but it did happen. Andrés and his sister Daniela had come with and for most the night we all danced in a group together but at one point I was dancing just with John. Then he gave me over to Andrés who had been with Daniela and John took her to dance. Andrés danced with me for a total of maybe five seconds and then dropped my hands. It was so awkward! And so I walked away and danced with the rest of the group. I was a little upset but didn't care too much that this chileno didn't want to dance with me- I didn't even really know him. Little did I know...

You'll have to wait for Part II to learn how we actually built a friendship and to see how I started falling for him. Until then I'll leave you with a couple pictures.

Starting off school with some morning prayer and praise

Dancing at El Huevo- both Andrés and I are there

In the next post find out...

How I surprised Andrés with this

And how we bonded over completos! Yummy.

Zumba Gets Me By

I had a great workout this morning. And that workout was Zumba. As you get to know me more, you will come to understand that I have a great love for Zumba. I first went to a class over Memorial Day weekend last year and since then I may or may not have become an addict. For those of you who don't know, Zumba is a Latin-inspired fitness class of dancing done to music like salsa, merengue, reggaeton, African beats, etc. And I love it! It's seriously fun and an intense workout at the same time. Their tagline is "Ditch the workout, join the party" and a lot of times, that's what it feels like.


I think one of the reasons Zumba stuck with me and why I like it so much is because it reminds me of my life in Chile. When I'm in Chile my life is different and I think some people would be surprised at how I live my life there versus how I live my life here. Now, it's not that I act like a totally different person there, I'm me (and I'm proud to be me) wherever I am. But when you're in another country, of course you're going to lead your life a little bit differently. In the United States, no matter if I'm living in Minnesota, Wyoming, Ohio or wherever, I don't go out very much. I don't go to bars really or clubbing. But in Chile... I love going out! I love being part of the big(ger) city nightlife and I LOVE TO DANCE! Especially with Andres. And especially reggaeton. 


The music is just fun, the beats are awesome, and the atmosphere is a little invigorating. I will admit, sometimes the lyrics can be a bit dirty and so I'm thankful that I don't understand most of the Spanish that they sing so fast (I guess I'll have to come out of my naivety and deal with that once I start understanding the lyrics more). But for now, I just really enjoy staying out until 4 or 5 in the morning, dancing all night. And I think that is what is surprising because I never do that here in the U.S. But I do miss it. One thing is where I'm living now, there's not a whole lot of places to go out to. Another thing is that I don't really have people to go out with here. So I have to bide my time and wait to go dancing until the next time I go to Chile. And sometimes waiting for that is surprisingly hard. Tengo ganas de bailar! But until I have that chance to go out dancing all night again, Zumba gets me by.